


Favorite

by TheLittleLostTimeLord



Category: Assassin's Creed
Genre: Child Abuse, Childhood Sexual Abuse, I'm Sorry, M/M, Past Sexual Abuse, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, i hurt all those i love, i'm a bad person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-22
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-09 22:52:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6927202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLittleLostTimeLord/pseuds/TheLittleLostTimeLord
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Altair was always Al Mualim's Favorite</p>
            </blockquote>





	Favorite

Al Mualim was dead. Masyaf was safe. The brotherhood was safe. But the whole castle felt on edge. To be betrayed from within their own ranks, by their leader. Assassins were naturally suspicious and with everything that had happened some of them felt they could no longer serve the brotherhood. Altair allowed those who felt as such to leave with honor.

Slowly things began to resemble normality again. Altair’s shoulders relaxed more, finally, he wasn’t constantly worried his authority would be questioned any more. The brotherhood had accepted their new leader, with the exception a small few, with open arms.

“Maliiiiikkk!” Altair whined, from the seat his study. Malik had taken to using it as well. “I’m bored! Talk to me!”

“Are you  _ actually _ a child, Novice?” Malik sighed, put down his quill and turned to face his friend. “I have work to do, and so do you. Now where’d i put that map.”

Altair smirked and held a scroll up. “This map?”

Malik sighed, rolled his eyes, and made his way across the room. Before he reached Altair he had dashed from the room, laughing. It had been so long since he’d heard Altair laugh like that. Malik couldn’t help but smile as he chased after him. The chase ended when Altair tripped backwards and pulled Malik, who’d been clinging to him and desperately trying to reach the map held up high, to the ground with him in a small garden. There was a moment that neither moved a muscle, save for breathing, staring each other in the eye, hearts racing. Then Malik moved. He leaned down and kissed Altair, gently. Altair sighed happily and wrapped his arms around Malik and returned the kiss. He sat up, still holding Malik closely, still kissing. It was only when they were desperate for air that they stopped. 

“Altair.” Malik sighed happily as he rested his head on the other’s shoulder. They’d both knew this was coming for a long time, but hadn’t wanted to make the first move. “Altair, I love you.”

It was hard for Malik to think of a time he hadn’t loved Altair. The first time he’d consciously realized it they were sixteen, but he’d already been in love before that. It was the very fact that he loved Altair, that made what happened at the temple so painful. How could he love the man who’d, at least indirectly, been responsible for his brother’s death. Time and maturity allowed him to forgive Altair, he’d changed. The old Altair was impulsive and spontaneous, he didn’t think, he made sloppy mistakes, but his skill covered them up. He was Al Mualim’s favorite, in their mentor’s eyes, it seemed, he could do no wrong. When he fell out of Al Mualim’s favor he changed. He was more aware of other, and their viewpoints. He could see his flaws and he sought to better himself. He’d grown up so much since then.

“I love you, Malik. I really truly do.” Altair vowed before kissing him again.

“We should bring this inside or the other novices might see.” Malik teased.

Altair froze. Every joint in his body locked. His eyes were staring off into the difference. His breathing was deliberate and strained, like he was hyperventilating very slowly.

“Altair! Altair!” Malik was scared. He called his name, but it was as if Altair couldn’t hear him, but physically Altair was fine. Malik jumped up to lock the door to the garden, no one else needed to see him like this. When he returned he gathered Altair into his arms and whispered to him that he was there for him. He stroked Altair’s hair. He began to sing the lullaby he’d sung to Kader when they were young. Altair would tease him about it but he knew that secretly he liked it when Malik sang.

Slowly Altair’s muscles started to relax, his breathing slowed, his eyes closed and he curled closer into Malik’s arms crying his name. Malik just rubbed his back and did his best to comfort him, although he didn’t know what was wrong. Eventually Altair was able to take a deep breath and pull himself away from Malik. He stood up quickly.

“I’m sorry.” He tried to walk away, but Malik grabbed his wrist gently and he turned back.

“Talk to me.” He said softly stroking Altair’s cheek. “I want to help.”

“I can’t talk about it.” Altair’s head was bowed.

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No!” Altair replied as fast as he could.

“Will you at least sit with me until you’re calmer. There’s no need to worry the novices. We don’t have to talk, but I’ll listen if you do.”

Altair agreed and sat, leaning on Malik, who had his back to a tree. They sat in silence for a long while. Then suddenly Altair spoke.

“I was eleven. My father had just died. I looked to Al Mualim for support. He was all I had left.” Altair bit back a sob. Malik wanted to comfort him, but somehow he felt that Altair needed to finish what he had to say first. Altair took a short moment to just breathe. “I didn’t understand, Malik. I didn’t know what was happening. All I knew was I was his favorite. He used to tell me that all the time, Malik.” 

Malik squeezed him tighter and stroked his hair, gently. Altair didn’t pull away like he had earlier, instead he leaned into Malik’s chest more.

“He used to tell me how much i’d improved, with such praise. He said it made him happy to see me improve. One day he asked if I wanted to make him even happier. Of course I did! I was a kid! He was closest I had to a parent left. He took me to his room.” Altair started to freeze again, but Malik was able to calm him before he did. He took a very deep breth and bowed his head a bit more. “He said he wanted to make me feel good. It did,...that time. He was so kind, at least at the start. As time went on he was harder to please in the training ring and his room and he wanted more from me than ever before. I didn’t know how to say no to him, so he took what he wanted. He started to be rougher. He’d look at me and order me to come inside, just ‘come inside, Altair’. It wasn’t aggressive until we were out of the view of others.”

Malik remembered Altair frequently being called in by their mentor, sometimes even in the middle of lessons. They’d all been jealous of the extra attention Altair got, now Malik felt terrible for feeling that.

“When I turned fifteen he cast me aside. I didn’t know what I’d done wrong. I wanted to be his favorite, still. I worked so hard in my training but he never seemed to be paying attention. He was always watching the younger novices. I didn’t realize what had really happened until I was twenty.”

“Oh, Altair.” 

“It wasn’t you. I just got hit with the memories and froze up like I used to, when you asked me to go inside with you. But when you started singing I was brought back to our room in childhood. The three of us, you, me, and Kader. I felt safe. I felt loved.”

“Altair? May I kiss you?” Malik asked, being sure to get explicit permission.

“Please, do.” Altair looked up and brought his lips to Malik’s. This kiss was different. It wasn’t hungry or demanding like the earlier had been. It was soft and comforting.

“I do want to give myself to you. But I just can’t right now.” Altair stated, almost apologizing.

“There’ll be plenty of time in the future. I’ll follow your lead. When you’re ready, we will.” The sun was nearly down on the horizon and Altair was clearly exhausted.”Would you like to stay with me tonight, like when we were young. I’ll hold you as you sleep. Just sleep.” He assure Altair.

“Yes.” It was barely more than a whisper. “I love you, Malik.”

Altair didn’t want a response really, he just needed to say it again. Malik kissed his cheek and the two of them made their way through the castle to the safety of Malik’s room. After that night the number of time Altair did not sleep in that room while in Masyaf could be counted on one hand.

**Author's Note:**

> i seriously need to stop hurting these characters  
> [My Tumblr](http://www.wolfstarforever.tumblr.com)  
> [My Writing Tumblr](http://www.thelittlelosttimelord.tumblr.com/)


End file.
